Coverart for item
The Resource Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist : how to end the drama and get on with life, Margalis Fjelstad

Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist : how to end the drama and get on with life, Margalis Fjelstad

Label
Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist : how to end the drama and get on with life
Title
Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist
Title remainder
how to end the drama and get on with life
Statement of responsibility
Margalis Fjelstad
Creator
Subject
Language
eng
Summary
People with borderline or narcissistic personality disorders have a serious mental illness that primarily affects their intimate, personal, and family relationships. Often they appear to be normally functioning at work and in public interactions, and Narcissists may even be highly effective, in the short term, in some work or social situations. However, in intimate relationships, they can be emotional, aggressive, demeaning, illogical, paranoid, accusing, and controlling in the extreme. Their ability to function normally or pleasantly can suddenly change in an instant, like flipping a switch. These negative behaviors do not happen once in a while, they happen almost continuously in their intimate relationships and most often, and especially with their caretaker family member. Here, the author describes how people get into a caretaker role with a borderline or narcissist, and how they can get out. Caretakers give up their sense of self to become who and what the borderline or narcissist needs them to be. This compromises the caretaker's self-esteem, distorts their thinking processes, and locks them into a victim-persecutor-rescuer pattern with the borderline or narcissist. The book looks at the underlying rules and expectations in these relationships and shows caretakers how to move themselves out of these rigid interactions and into a healthier, more productive, and positive lifestyle, with or without the borderline/narcissistic partner or family member. It describes how to get out of destructive interactions with the borderline or narcissist and how to take new, more effective actions to focus on personal wants, needs, and life goals while allowing the borderline or narcissist to take care of themselves. It presents a realistic, yet compassionate, attitude toward the self-destructive nature of these relationships, and gives real life examples of how individuals have let go of their caretaker behaviors with creative and effective solutions
Cataloging source
DLC
http://library.link/vocab/creatorDate
1945-
http://library.link/vocab/creatorName
Fjelstad, Margalis
Dewey number
155.2/32
Index
index present
Literary form
non fiction
Nature of contents
bibliography
http://library.link/vocab/subjectName
  • Narcissism
  • Narcissists
  • Enabling (Psychology)
  • Codependency
Label
Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist : how to end the drama and get on with life, Margalis Fjelstad
Instantiates
Publication
Bibliography note
Includes bibliographical references (p. 203-207) and index
Contents
Understanding the Caretaker Role. Is my partner really a borderline or narcissist? ; Why the borderline/narcissist needs a caretaker ; What is a caretaker? ; Caretaker involvement levels ; Emotional distortions of caretakers ; Thought distortions of caretakers ; Behavioral distortions of caretakers ; Distortions in the sense of self ; Relationship distortions of caretakers. -- Letting Go of Caretaking. Stages of healing ; Challenging the BP/NP family rules ; Beginning to heal: embracing new beliefs and behaviors ; Increasing your self-confidence ; Nurturing and caring for yourself ; Anxiety-reducing skills with the BP/NP ; Change-creating skills with the BP/NP ; Leaving or staying. -- Rebuilding. Moving forward in a healthy way ; Reaching out to others ; The new you ; Caretaker test
Dimensions
25 cm.
Extent
viii, 217 p.
Isbn
9781442220188
Isbn Type
(cloth : alk. paper)
Lccn
2012040275
System control number
  • ocn806017620
  • 516418
  • (OCoLC)806017620
Label
Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist : how to end the drama and get on with life, Margalis Fjelstad
Publication
Bibliography note
Includes bibliographical references (p. 203-207) and index
Contents
Understanding the Caretaker Role. Is my partner really a borderline or narcissist? ; Why the borderline/narcissist needs a caretaker ; What is a caretaker? ; Caretaker involvement levels ; Emotional distortions of caretakers ; Thought distortions of caretakers ; Behavioral distortions of caretakers ; Distortions in the sense of self ; Relationship distortions of caretakers. -- Letting Go of Caretaking. Stages of healing ; Challenging the BP/NP family rules ; Beginning to heal: embracing new beliefs and behaviors ; Increasing your self-confidence ; Nurturing and caring for yourself ; Anxiety-reducing skills with the BP/NP ; Change-creating skills with the BP/NP ; Leaving or staying. -- Rebuilding. Moving forward in a healthy way ; Reaching out to others ; The new you ; Caretaker test
Dimensions
25 cm.
Extent
viii, 217 p.
Isbn
9781442220188
Isbn Type
(cloth : alk. paper)
Lccn
2012040275
System control number
  • ocn806017620
  • 516418
  • (OCoLC)806017620

Library Locations

    • Indian Trail BranchBorrow it
      4909 West Barnes Rd., Spokane, WA, 99208, US
      47.740374 -117.482822
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